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I haven't posted in quite a while, although I do read the posts from time to time, but here goes. After taking care of my MIL for a little over 2 yrs, I have neglected myself and now my own health is at risk. In April I was found to be anemic, a week later I was diagnosed borderline diabetic and just 2 days ago had a colonoscopy and a tumor was found. I will have to have surgery. The biopsy isn't back yet. I have lost about 12 lbs and eating better and exercising. Monday is my first visit with the surgeon. My sister says its all the stress from having to take care of my MIL. My father was a borderline diabetic but he was in his late 80's when he got it. He lived a good life to 91. I'm only 54. I was always healthy but the past 2 yrs I ate junk and didn't take care of myself. Sometimes I blame myself and sometimes I blame my MIL. She is actually doing pretty good, takes care of herown needs, I just give her the meds and her meals. Her short term memory is sporadic but her judgement is still bad. So I have ceased telling her what she shouldn't do and God knows SHE HATES TO BE TOLD WHAT SHE CAN AND CAN'T DO. She still chatters away and I just ignore her and put in a yes or no from time to time. She says she is "interested" but I think she is nosy, I even told her so, and my hubby and I have no privacy. I just picture my future as her caregiver forever. Putting her in a home is impossible, due to financial matters and other family members are not available. I found out today that her friends at church have been trying for a long time to get her out of the house to socialize with them! Sometimes I think she stays at home just to torment me. I am just ranting and need to stop. My medical situation has left me in shock and it's hard just to think about it. My husband is my rock and an angel. So Jane, I remember your posts about caregivers and what can happen to them. So to all, take care of yourself!
Leighanne
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Hi Leighanne:

I am so sorry to hear that you are having health problems. My father had colon cancer for over ten years before we found out. I can pinpoint it directly to the stress that he went through in the early 1990's when my mother separated from him after fifty years of marriage. He had an operation over three years ago and is still kicking. So, stress is bad for us all...

I know how you feel and some days it seems like life is not ours to live as we would like. Sometimes I miss having a relationship but, when I hear my neighbors fight, I am grateful that I am not married during this time. However, it sounds as if you have been blessed with your DH. Hang in there and take care of yourself. You can overcome with a good diet and exercise many health problems.

Keep up the good work Leighanne and know that we are here for you. Clean out those cupboards and remove the junk food (as we all should do). Thank you for sharing this important message and do take care.

Love and Hugs from Glenda
Hi Leighanne

welcome back.. I am sorry to hear about your health as well. Most caregivers just don't realize4 how they are comprimising their own life when they neglect themselves while caring for another.. it sounds as if you have had a wake up call that has set you back on your own path of recovery and healing.. my thoughts and prayers are with you... please keep us posted.

richest blessings

gail
Hi All,
I had surgery on 7/3 and dr said operation went well. Now missing a foot and a half of colon. He said got it early, didn't spread, but wants me to see oncologist for 2nd opinion if I need chemo. Been home for about 2 1/2 wks, dr said take it easy. Feeling good and MIL has been ok thanks to hubby. I remind myself that she can't help what she says or does. I don't react to her anymore, don't need the stress.
Leighanne
Hi Leighanne:

Thank you for the update. I am so glad to hear all went well and you are better. Do take it easy now and forever... I have to think that when we have life-threatening issues, it re-sorts our priorities in a healthy manner. Definitely, a wake-up call, isn't it?

Keep taking care of yourself Leighanne. Healing is so powerful. Your hubby sounds like a dear. It is wonderful when family pulls together like you have...

Love and Hugs from Glenda

[This message has been edited by glenderella (edited 07-28-2006).]

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