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Hello all
Mom passed away on December 11th. It was peaceful and what she wanted but boy do I miss her. The first week I was in shock and now I am so sad. I miss her so much. I am aching inside. I am functioning, getting out etc. but I am having a hard time figuring out what to do, my life was taking care of Mom and spending time with her and now I am feeling lost, angry, sad and plenty of other emotions. I am edgy and short tempered and really tough to for my hubby to be around. I am looking for some support groups to join. I just don't know what to do with myself. Thank you all for being so supportive

[This message has been edited by Daria (edited 12-26-2003).]
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{{{{Daria}}}} lots of love and warm hugs are coming your way.. all that you are experiencing is quite normal... are there support groups offline in your area that you can attend.. let me know the city you are closest too and I will try to research something for you...

In the meantime, please continue to post here and we will offer as much assistance as possible.. if you are interested I can give you links to grief support online as well...

it is very difficult when you are caring for someone 24/7 and all of a sudden there is no more caring to do.. Shock is usually first, then anger, hurt, feelings of abandoment.. the sadness all come at different moments in the day, when you are thinking different things; sometimes catching you completely off guard.. share with your husband what you are feeling so he truly understands.. I am sure he does.. but it is important to communicate with him as well..

you might also try writing down everything you are feeling... writing lets you release some of the heaviness and keep it in a safe place..

Most importantly be gentle and nurturing to yourself.. you have been an incredible blessing for your mother.. I know she is grateful... take care of you now as you did her so that you may heal gently in your own time..don't push yourself or beat yourself for having the feelings that you are having...

If you can still yourself in your own energy at different times of the day, you may even feel or sense your mom's presence near you...

please keep us posted... you are in my thoughts and prayers... richest blessing

Oh Daria.... it is all so recent and also an emotional time of the year. Give yourself lots of time and plan to do some special things just for you.

You might want to enjoy an afternoon of family photos and memories... allright and a bit of a cry... so????

You might want to go on a long quiet drive by yourself or maybe a friend or husband.... just think about looking at that beautiful world outside.

Time will get you to the place when you are finally at peace and have refound your place in the world..... we do lose it somewhat. Give yourself space and also love.

x A
Daria... that is so good to have a little vacation.... AND.... let up on yourself a bit. So good you have a good man beside you give him a gentle hug from me.

As time becomes better for you it will be easier to pass some attention his way too.... I think you have both been walking this very difficult path.

My love A
Back from my trip. It was beautiful! Came to the realization that I need counseling and a support group on the double. I am trying to be SUPERGIRL and all the emotions that I am stuffing away are sneaking out the wrong way and hurting the one I love the most. I have a lot of fear of what is stuffed inside me, this is why I have been so apprehensive about asking for help. I know now that I need help, right away.
I am so sorry Daria.

I recall when my mother passed, I was aching inside as you stated. Then I was angry, indulged in self pity, etc. It took about six months before I could talk about her without crying. I would yell at my daughter, who was grieving too. Sometimes we forget that others are grieving too. It's normal to lash out. I think it is a good idea to seek outside help if you feel you need that. Also, there are alot of great books on handling death. The experiences others share, etc. God Bless you and your family. Take good care of yourself.
Hi Daria,

I am so happy to hear that you had a good time away.. and that you had time to think and sort things out a bit.. getting those emotions out now rather than carrying them for many many years, letting them run your life is best done now with the help of a good therapist who will guide you gently and nurturing through the process... please keep us posted .. even though you mom has passed, you have a safe place here to post where others will continue to respond...

richest blessings

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