I'll start posting here since I've introduced myself already.
Husband has been having sleep and fatigue problems. Sunday he slept a good 4 hours during the day and 10 hours that night, yesterday he slept another 6 hours during the day, and last night slept well until 4:30 am then dozed off and on. It's not even noon yet, and already he's had two naps - one for 2 hours, and he just went down for his 2nd nap.
A good part of his problem is that he takes so many medications, and so many have a tranquilizing effect, that I'm fairly certain he needs to get them rebalanced. Unfortunately, he has so many doctors (partly due to myriad health problems, and partly because he keeps trying to get referrals out of our HMO system) that getting them all on the same page would be difficult. Plus, his depression is still not managed yet - Sunday he said he had a terrible downward mood swing - but I am hopeful he will find a therapist soon who can at least help him learn to deal with everything.
As for me, I'm hanging in there. My father visits this weekend - he always stays in a motel and is a piece of cake as far as entertaining goes so it will be a good weekend, if tiring for me. A couple of months ago I also started trying to form a Ya-Ya group (women's group, just to get together with other women for the fun of being with other women) but haven't been able to carry through with it. I did have five people express interest, the thing that's holding me back is my own fatigue and not wanting to take on another "duty". I'm hoping that once we've had the first get together, someone else will take on organizing the next one, and so on.
Every once in awhile my husband reminds me that he wants to die in this house (well, condo) and that an assisted living facility is out of the question. I understand how he feels, but there are moments when I think it would be easier for us both if he did go to one - he'd have the round-the-clock care and attention he needs, and I'd have a chance to breathe. Of course, I know that's just my tiredness talking, but there are times when I would like to have some REAL alone time. Unfortunately, as long as he's here in the house, I know I will have to be on "alert", unless his aide is here - which is right about the same time I have to be at work. So I really DON'T get any "time to myself" until after husband goes to bed, and lately he's been calling me for additional support - turn off the window fan, re-install his earplugs, etc. so just as I get comfortable I have to get up and tend to his needs.
I wish there was a care-givers support group I could go to, but none of the ones here in the Seattle area are at a good time or a good location for me. (Not owning a car is a handicap at times.) If there are any care-givers in the Seattle area who would be willing to meet on Sunday afternoons, that would be great! I really need to find a way to get a break from...well, life, I guess... because the unending pressure is getting to me.