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What to Do or Say

Hi All:

Dad is stable which is all I can say. I don't think we are going to graduate off hospice again... But what do I know???

I know that I have the same anxiety I did during the first hospice but even more so. The waking up in the middle of the night several times a night. Running downstairs and making sure he's covered or comfortable... Waking up in the morning with the same feeling of dread as before.

His breathing is so weak... Yet he is still strong. Today the nurse was here checking on him and he didn't want her messing with him! Of course, I forgot to forewarn him she was coming because she called a the last minute while he was having a massage. I should not have even scheduled her after that... Anyhow, as I ramble on, my point is that she asked me: "Does he always put up such a fight?" and I said "Yes, about certain things he does."

So, he understands everything (for having so much TIA damage according to the doctors). She asked him if "he could tell her if he was in pain?" and he said "yes" - so she took that to mean that he was in pain. So when she asked to point to where he was hurting she got no response. So I said "he didn't say he was in pain..." So of course when she asked him properly, he told her he was in no pain...

Anyhow, I am babbling on here and just wanted to keep you all posted. Need to vent a bit after all... It is not an easy time and when I read some of the old postings I learn something new every day. We could be this way for quite a while and one never knows. All I know is we have made it over one month now...

Hug Time from Glenda
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