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Welcome me to the world of full-time caregiving

My mother's cancer is getting worse and it became obvious that the rehab center where she went straight from the hospital wasn't doing her any good, and that there isn't a lot of time left, so we have brought her home. I am taking leave from work, so I am caring for her full-time now. I will probably be asking for advice a lot, because I am finding myself inept about physically caring for someone. Hospice will be coming in to help, thank goodness. It is good not to have to go to work at least, because trying to care for my mom and work too was making me nuts. My biggest struggle was always feeling like I wasn't where I should be; when I was sitting at the hospital with Mom I felt like I should be at work and when I was at work I should be with Mom.

The day we brought Mom home, we also got a call that my husband's mother had taken a turn for the worst. She has lung cancer. She has now been moved to a hospice house and my husband is there almost 24 hours a day. I have gone there when I can, if I have someone to sit here with my mom.

I did face a fear of mine. Mom desperately needed her toenails cut, they were becoming pretty wild. For some incomprehensible reason, I didn't want to touch her feet, not sure why. I even thought about asking the hospice people if they would do it, but then decided that was ridiculous. So this morning I gave her a pedicure, and guess what? It wasn't really a big deal at all. I even think it was kind of nice for both of us.

On 5/22, I took her to the oncologist because she had lost 7 pounds in the week she had been at the rehab center and I was worried because I thought I was seeing an overall decline. I asked if we were looking at days, weeks or months. He said "One month, well, one to three." I definitely felt he leaned more towards one.

She is off the hormone therapy. She wasn't on it long enough to know if it was "working" or not. The dr. agreed that, given her mental deterioration also, that it didn't make sense to try to buy her another year or two, especially what with the pain she is in.
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