Thank you so much for responding! bamagirl, yes you got it correct. We were hoping to transfer her to an in-patient hospice, but all her doctors agree she is not there yet physically. The problem is that the cancer in her brain (so they say) is finally just affecting her brain function. She's grabbing at things that aren't there, speaking in german (she grew up in germany), and sometimes speaking in gibberish. I spoke to her on the phone briefly and was able to understand MOST of what she mumbled, however...so awful to hear her that way.
Anyway, yes, because she needs 24-hour care RIGHT NOW, the hospital needs to move her to a nh (they can't keep her indefinitely). My sister (who is there with her) has a friend who is a nurse and has worked at every nh in the county. The ones she recommended of course did not have an open bed and we are now making our way down the list (closer and closer to the ones she said she wouldn't send her DOG to!!!) trying to find an open spot to move her to. Yes, my sister, my aunt (who is driving there today from KY), and me are all looking at this as TEMPORARY and want to get her out of whatever NH AS SOON AS POSSIBLE. I just don't know where to start! I mean, I guess I should call Medicare today and see if there's EVER a situation where they would help pay for homecare? The social worker at the hospital said she has seen cases where they will do that cuz it's actually less than paying for her to be in a facility??? Has anyone ever heard of that???
As far as my mom's assets, she pretty much has nothing. We were very poor growing up and she was a single parent, worked at the local Girl Scout Office her entire time in this country for a meager wage. She put the house (her one pride in life, which is why she wants so desperately to be there) in me and my sister's name a long time ago and a lawyer helped us do all that so that it couldn't be taken from her. My sister and I split the house payment right now, and my mom has a car that she paid cash for and refuses to get rid of (even though she can't drive anymore). But nothing else in savings or stocks or anything like that. She applied for Medicaid twice but was denied...I can't imagine how poor you have to be to get medicaid because she has NOTHING!? Should I look into that again, or would medicaid not even help me right now?
Oh, my mom is 59 - last year when she started to really decline I looked into some community programs and they all started at age 60. She won't be 60 until February. And no, she will not move out here to CO. Believe me, I've been trying to convince her for years because I'm a stay-at-home mom and she could be with me and my son all day instead of alone in PA (my sister works of course). But she does NOT want to leave her house.
I guess I'm just wondering where to start to see if we can get her this care at home...has ANYone had 24-hour home care?