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Reply to "How Do You Deal With Your Threatening Siblings & Siblings Who Will Not Help"

Hello Carol
I know what you are going thru...have a feeling your brother might be the older one of both of this true? Somehow, as caregivers, when we are thrown into the role of caring for a parent...all the old family patterns creep us and haunt us...They never really left.

For me I had been so successful in my own life that the old patterns didn't have an opportunity to surface. However, once I was in the role of caring for my father...and helping and caring for mom as well....all the old poop surfaced as if they never had left since I was a teenager.

The options I looked at were expressing my feelings and needs to my parents, helping them to see the old patterns...It wasn't easy but I did. My brother treated me as if I was a child....

I was the only one dealing with everything as it came along. Somewhere deep inside myself, I knew I was doing an incredible job as a caregiver. I decided that while my parents or brother my never really acknowledged me, I knew in my heart I was doing incredible work. This was what I needed for myself to sustain me to carry on.

After a while, both my parents were able to see the unconditional love that I
offered, the assistance and the wisdom.

Their attitudes began to shift and after a lot more conscious work....they were able to express their love and gratitude to me.
I believe I can safely say at this point..I knew what I had to do and did it with out any expectation. Once i let go of the expectations, things fell in place with more ease and less effort...Hope this helps you.

The Empowering Caregivers Chat on AOL on Thurs at 8PM EST offers wonderful support from others who are in the same situation as you are in... this is the link:
<A HREF="aol://2719:3-691-Mutual%20Support%20Room">MUTUAL SUPPORT ROOM</A>.

Chats are also offered from the Empowering Caregivers Site....Come visit us...and you can also subscribe to the free EMPOWERING CAREGIVERS NEWSLETTER here at the site.

Blessings to you.