What a difficult health crisis you and your family are dealing with. I can imagine that, after a year of all that preparation, you are probably exhausted by now... It can be such a roller coaster ride with all sorts of emotions attached.
I think sometimes that is the most difficult part is trying to keep going when disabled by anxiety or anger etc. It helps to have others understand that we have feelings about the situation also - but many people don't get it! Just know we are here for you...
Skwirl said it best about being invisible when being a caregiver. It is sad but true. She is right also that you are a loving and caring person even when you don't feel as if you are... I have been there myself! Remember to take that time for yourself because it is important to gain perspective on things. Take a walk in the garden, breathe, and find ways to reward yourself in little ways if you can - be good to you!