Welcome Frankie! You are not alone... My 92 year old mother is also in a facility (frailcility - lol) of her own choosing - TG. My father passed away a few years ago after a difficult time with cancer and dementia issues. I was his main caregiver for almost six years.
I visit my mother on holidays mainly and I know I should see her more often - but it is difficult... There have been many different family issues that have caused serious rifts over the years. I do think that care-giving can sometimes aggravate already problematic family relationships. It is no easy task! At any rate, I am working to repair the rift between us and to forgive/forget the past. I am just grateful that she is in a good place.
The main thing that I have realized is that they do make a life of their own in the care facility over time. Your mother's resistance should gradually fade over time if all goes well. It is not an easy transition and there is not much anyone can do about it. Just know that we are here for you and try to remember to breathe deeply and take care of yourself.