Dad's so weak

My father amazes me. He is barely 100lbs, his thighs are the size of my forearms and he tries so hard to get up. Sometimes he can sit up by himself, others not. His diapers constantly wet from the fluid pills and fluid intake. I still wheel him into the kitchen and he can sit only about 10 min. or less. Some days he can eat, other's not. Hospice was in today to give him his bed bath, change sheets, etc. It's 2:58AM, he just woke me because he was soaked. I feel so bad for him. His will is stronger than I have ever seen. For that I am thankful. His Pacemaker/ICD shocked him bad again twice the other day. The Hospice nurse i called said she did not know what to do about that. My father has not signed the DNR, so i called ER doc and he said not much to do any more but give him more morphine. I did. Poor man. I am exhausted. It's sad. he keeps on trying. He hardly wants to watch TV either. I can't get him outside either. he's to weak for fresh air. Some days he's real sweet to me, other's not. but hec, so am I.
Sue

[This message has been edited by Notenoughhours (edited 07-06-2005).]
Original Post
Not Enough Hours::

MY wife is terminally ill with an aggressive cancer. While she is not yet end stage they tell us time is grwoing more and more short.
She needs more and more help as her body fails her.

I cannot tell you in words how much I feel for you.

(((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))))

Just know that I can relate and wish you strength, courage and luv.

I will be sure to check here regularly.

phil s-r
Hello Sue:

God bless you. It is so hard to watch someone you love get weaker and weaker. How is hospice working out for you? Are they helping with the "end of life" issues a lot?

I am curious, (if you don't mind my asking) about the fluid pills that your dad is taking. Do they actually help him retain fluids or do they dehydrate? They sound similar to a prescription that they gave my father when he came home on hospice. I can't remember the name of it, however, ...

Meanwhile, stay strong Sue, and listen to your heart. Love to you and your father (even on those not so good days). I know I often wish Dad was his "old" self and not so old. Take care of yourself.

Hugs to Sue from Glenda
Hi sue....and phil....

I feel too for both of you...watching a loved one's strength diminishing, knowing there is no cure, no miracle will happen...is without a doubt the hardest thing in life any of us will ever have to deal with...
One thing I have learned with the passing of both my parents is that these wonderful people who gave me life and brought me up did a wonderful job in the strength and compassion department...it's true..one's "life" experiences do mold you into the person you become...
You both take care..and you both
will be in my thoughts and prayers..
PrairieGal
Hi Phil:
{{{{Hugs to you too}}}}

I am sorry to hear of your wife's illness. What type of cancer does she have? (If I may ask).
Yes, the watching is so very hard. It breaks your heart, exhausts you and makes you angry all at once.
Sometimes I want to say - ENOUGH! But if I had that kind of power, I would make him well. As I know you would do the same for your wife.
Thank you for your kind words. How are you doing?
Sue

[This message has been edited by Notenoughhours (edited 07-17-2005).]
Hi Glenda:

Hope life is finding you well.
The fluid pills are Bumex and Spirolactone (sp) - those deplete the fluid so that his lungs stay less congested. The problem is, they dehydrate him so he is always thirsty (having water) so either way he urinates often. He is also on Coreg, Coumadin, Amirodrone (sp), Digoxin.
Hospice is fine. He can only have bed baths and that wheres him out. However, some days I cannot just deal with Hospice. Seems someone is always coming in and out of here. Sounds mean and I am sorry. But they do the bath thing and the nurse keeps a check on his fluid retention, etc. That's about it. The Chaplin calls and visits too.
Hugs,
Sue


[This message has been edited by Notenoughhours (edited 07-17-2005).]
Hi PG:
I hope life finds you well.
Thank you for sharing. You are so right. This is very hard and I am not sorry for any one miniute of being a caregiver.
If I am ever in need of long term care myself, I hope I have someone to take care of me that's like all of those here.
Hugs,
Sue
Hi Sue:

I know what you mean about the revolving door with hospice. It was that way from the getgo here. We had physical therapy and nurses etc with the hip and then the nurses, doctor and more therapy with hospice. It can be so wearing!

Thanks for the info on the meds. I am so sad for you and what you are going through now. It's such a hard time! God bless your family!

Love and hugs from Glenda

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